I graduated college in May of 2008, and moved out to DC in October of that year. Four months later, I needed a temporary housing situation while I transitioned from my political appointment at the Department of Health and Human Services and looked for a new job. I spent January of 2009 at Centro Maria, a residence run by Religious Sisters whose apostolate is assisting young women, and here in DC they accomplish this by renting out rooms to them. I requested prayers from one of the sisters there and she invited me to make a retreat. She gave me spiritual exercises which I would meditate on, and meet with her to discuss how the Lord was speaking to my heart. Even though I got a job and moved to Virginia, I continued to come back every month for these retreats. I loved having a day set apart for silence and solitude spent with Him in prayer and contemplation. These days of recollection were invaluable to me falling in love with Christ, and I believe they were igniting the contemplative flame in my heart.
Run for Vocations
In the Spring of 2009, inspired by my dear friend Sasha, I signed up for the Run for Vocations Team. It's a group that raises money for the Seminarians in the Archdiocese of Washington. The team members get together for socials throughout the year and run in the Marine Corps Marine or 10k here in DC every October, or support the effort. Sasha had already run the marathon a couple times, and gave me the confidence that I could too. My training frequently consisted of running to morning mass or adoration in the evening at the church a couple miles from my apartment. I said I was killing two birds with one stone by running to Jesus. I would frequently pray the rosary while I ran, carrying a palm card with me until I memorized all the mysteries for each day. I offered up my runs for special intentions, especially for priests and seminarians, and for vocations. Through running, praying, and partying for Christ, Run for Vocations had a profound impact on me. Spiritual Direction
I first started seriously discerning God's will for my life during this time. I had a friend who was discerning Religious Life, and she suggested that we go visit an order together. In August of 2009 we went up to stay with the Missionaries of Charity in New York City. On the bus ride back to DC I was processing what the Lord had revealed to me that weekend. Although I did not know through what means, I felt the call and desire on my heart to totally consecrate myself to Him. Then I began spiritual direction, which involved my seeing a priest on a monthly basis to discuss what was going on in my life, and help me grow in holiness and virtue. He was also my confessor, so I was receiving the graces from the sacrament of Reconciliation. Spiritual Direction was invaluable in grounding me in my faith and confidence in the Lord, and helping me grow ever closer to Him so that I could be completely open to hearing and answering His call. Obedience to a spiritual director was a cross at times, but one that bore so much fruit.
Women's Discernment Group
That August I also contacted the Arlington Diocese's Office of Vocations. A lady who leads the Women's Discernment Group invited me to attend a meeting. We met on a monthly basis for dinner, a discussion on whatever we were currently reading, and a holy hour. It was so good to be a part of this group, to talk to other women discerning God's will for their life, to pray for each other, and to meet other women religious who were invited from time to time. Seeing other people go through this process was a huge help to me. Having the community and support was invaluable. Having exposure to religious sisters and learning about the life and charism of their different active religious orders was helpful in discerning where God was calling me. We started out reading Vita Consecrata, and then read Religious Vocation: An Unnecessary Mystery. These were great resources that helped me tremendously in my journey.
Prayer, Scripture, and the Eucharist
The Liturgy of the Hours was key in helping me to become more consistent and disciplined in my prayer life. And once I could commit to doing Night Prayer faithfully every night, my spiritual director and I would little by little agree on adding more to my plate. Daily mass and frequent adoration were also key. I remember how terrified I was when I had to commit to going to mass EVERY day, not just when it was convenient. And now I can't imagine a day without it. The Eucharist truly is the source and summit of my faith. It is the sacrament of LOVE, when He gives himself to me and I try to empty myself to receive Him and be transformed by our union. And Eucharistic adoration has been my favorite mode of prayer for years. At college we had a perpetual adoration chapel where I would commit to covering a couple hours per week. And I continued this practice here in the DC area as well. Adoration is where I would simply place myself in the Lord's presence. I open myself up to hearing His voice speak to my heart. I read Scripture and let Him speak to me through the Word. I received many consolations in Scripture that confirmed my desire to make a total gift of self to Him.
